Preparing for answered prayer

Never pray something you aren't completely serious about and prepared to handle the answer. If you pray for patience-prepare to face every situation possible that tests your patience. And if you pray to learn to rely on God in a completely new way than ever before-prepare to be stripped of everything you rely on other than Him. Little did I know the danger in the prayer I prayed two months ago. But God is faithful-He will never leave me or forsake me.

8/6/2016
God help me transfer all the rejection coming my way to you. It piles up daily. But you can handle it. You are enough. You know what rejection feels like so you know exactly what I am going through. I may be despised and rejected by others but not by you. You are good and you created me. You love me just the way I am. If I go through this life with not a single friend, you are enough. You are my hope. You are my everything. I pray that I bring every hurt and every frustration and every one of my own sins to you so that I do not shoulder them alone. I pray I learn to rely on you in a completely new way than I ever have before. I don't need acceptance on this earth as long as I have you. Thank you for being consistent and persistent in your relationship with me. I humble myself before you knowing that I don't deserve you but proclaim the truth that you have chosen me as your own. I am your daughter and you are my father and my King. I love you. Help me through this journey to independence from others and full dependence on you.

Bitter wine. Bitter lessons.

The wine is dry and bitter tonight.
Not my preference.
But tonight dry and bitter is fitting.

2016. The year of humility.
Learning to lower myself and stripping my pride.
2016. The year of becoming stronger.
Learning to stretch and strengthen spiritually, mentally, physically.
2016. The year of letting go.
Learning to lean completely on God and none other.
2016. What a beautiful one you are.
But these lessons are not like sweet white wine.
These lessons taste dry and bitter.
And I love them.
I need them.
Over and over again.
Until the lessons are learned.
Until I am humble, strong, and dependent on God alone.
Day by day, God, you gently teach me...again.
I did not grasp the lesson yesterday.
And so today we start again.
And I see you.
I feel you.
I know you love me.
Enough.
Enough to cover for all I put in your place.
And it's all stripping away.
Yet it's not all gone.
The grasping, the pride, the weakness.
So tomorrow I will learn again.
Until I get it.
Until no one but you stands on my altar.
Until no pride remains.
Until I rest in the shadow of your wings.
Until I find refuge in you alone.
YOU are my rock.
YOU alone.
YOU.